Twins!!

Hey folks, I hope you’re doing well, and wanted to catch you up to speed on some new life happenings. Namely: babies. Two of them at once. Lindsay and I welcomed healthy fraternal twin boys into the world a few months ago.

So far, Twin A is big, open, loud and easygoing with his smiles. He’s also built like a tank, and a one-baby workout for anyone’s back. Twin B is smaller, quieter, and more shy with his smiles, but when you get a smile from him, you feel like a million bucks.

The babies are thriving and happy, and Lindsay is steadily recovering from a required C-section. In classic Lindsay form, she’s done a remarkable job with the kids, all while recovering from major abdominal surgery. Some of which includes, breastfeeding, non-stop pumping, running an ad hoc HR department (ie. sourcing help), hosting humans, sending me flowers with love notes, and more. All on very little sleep. Women are phenomenal. My woman in particular. She regularly leaves me in awe—and the boys are lucky to have her as their force of nature Mom. ❤️ 

It’s strange to observe the different standards for men and women as parents. Men are often glorified for doing small things (“You took your baby for a walk!”). Meanwhile, Lindsay dealt with all-day nausea for 6.5 months during pregnancy. In her “stubborn meets perfectionist” way, she also gave up coffee, her favorite foods, refused to take any painkillers, and more to make sure the babies had their best shot at optimal health.

Pumping breast milk for twins means she hasn’t gotten a full night of sleep for months. Women carry so much weight (literally, as Lindsay points out), and it’s often treated as though “it’s your job.” It quietly goes unquestioned. It also seems people rarely check-in regarding how much women might be holding throughout the whole process. Our society needs to learn how to recognize, support, and celebrate women in these spaces more.

Instead of the highlight reel that people see or post on social media, I hope we can move towards creating more spaces that talk about the challenges of pregnancy, childbirth, and parenting. It would be a more honest way to live and interact with one another, which is kind of what life is all about.

Sometimes when I’m trying to get a baby to sleep, Lindsay will come up behind me and guide me on how to sway or move or shush. It feels like dancing and it’s a wonderful way to learn how to sooth babies. One of her most impressive feats (to me) is taking a baby, coaxing him to sleep, then taking the *other baby* and coaxing him to sleep. Back-to-back baby whispering. 

We still haven’t decided how we feel about pictures of them being on the internet, so here’s a tasteful silhouette of Lindsay and twin B instead:

Lindsay and Twin B

So if you’re wondering what we’ve been up to over the last little bit, that’s it. 🙂

We’ve spent two cold winters in Canada, and are hoping to be elsewhere during the winter months. If you have thoughts on warm/fun places to spend the winter, with a baby-friendly tilt, let us know. California, Washington DC, Costa Rica, and Europe are all places we’re considering. Let us know if there’s places that are great to spend a winter with young ones!

This is Lindsay, my force of a human

I wanted to write a bit about my partner Lindsay Aranoff and why I’m so grateful we found each other. I could talk about the stuff you could discover from the internet (inaugural Global Shaper with the World Economic Forum, curator of a TEDxKids event in Canada, co-founder of a company with the CTO of Amazon), but you could find all that out yourself.

Lindsay looks for the chance to fight for the underdog and people that have less power. Sometimes that’s working to bring mobile medical care to people that don’t have it. Sometimes it’s reminding car drivers not to cut off bikers. Sometimes it’s standing up for a clerk when a customer is yelling at them. Sometimes it’s fostering dogs. A lot of the time, it’s working to make sure that everyone has access to basic human rights. 

We make a good team. Lindsay is a woman of action; I’m more of a man of planning. When I sometimes fall victim to analysis paralysis–what should we eat tonight or do this weekend?–Lindsay often just takes a leap to try something and see if it works. On the other hand, if there’s some administrative paperwork that needs to happen, that’s my time to shine. We fit together so well that early on, I said it was like the universe created us for each other. It still feels like that.

We especially love getting out into nature and hiking together. Lindsay introduced me to the Adirondack High Peaks, and I introduced her to my favorite rock in the hills of Eastern Kentucky. Getting out into nature helps us both stay grounded and we savor the ability to get into green tree tunnels. It’s fun to walk down mountain trails while we talk about what schools should really teach people besides just reading or math. Education needs an overhaul, and we talked through all the courses we would want in a curriculum–and how experiential learning would be better. What real-world life skills do you wish *you* had a chance to learn earlier?

In an emergency, Lindsay is the person you want in your corner. When a dog we were fostering had an allergic reaction, she carried it out into the street barefoot, flagged down a car (during a pandemic), and got the dog to a vet in minutes. Another time we got a flat tire at dusk in the rain on the New Jersey Turnpike. By the time I’d figured out how to get the spare tire out of the back, Lindsay had help on the way and had already scheduled an appointment to replace the tire for the next morning. 

Lindsay has also helped me recognize the dynamics of power and how to be a better, more intentional person. She regularly reminds me that the way the world works for me is not the way it works for most people, and how the world needs to work better for everyone. Where my communication is often too soft, Lindsay will speak frankly. We operate so differently, yet it’s fascinating how we invite each other to grow.

Lindsay is Canadian and this week we’re heading to Toronto, Canada with our dog Rojo. Lindsay moved to Washington, DC and supported me during a stressful job while building her own company, designing the entire interior of our rowhouse, and acclimatizing to a new city. This was during a pandemic that made our arrangement last a year longer than we expected due to COVID. All of that is code for: she’s a fierce lady that I hope some of you get to meet.

Now I’m excited to spend time with some of Lindsay’s friends, family, and favorite dogs in Toronto. I’m still decompressing after leaving my job, but please reach out if you’re in the Toronto area. We would welcome a dog walk with friends at Cherry Beach.

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