He broke my hort!

Loren at Search Engine Journal is taking votes for search engine blog awards. Jeremy and I are both up for the Which Search Employee’s Blog Most Likely to Flame You For Spamming? award.

Jeremy has been blogging since at least 2002. I’ve been blogging for 3 months. So who is trying to stuff the ballot box? Oh no he didn’t! Jeremy, you’re breaking everybody’s heart:

Broken Spam Heart

Let’s see why you might vote for me. If you tally it up, almost 10% of all of my posts have been flaming spam or SEO mistakes. It’s like a tradition here on my blog. In fact, I’m a-gonna call out another example later tonight, just as a little bonus. Why? Just because I care enough to flame a spammer for you, readers.

Why might you vote for Jeremy? Okay, let’s break this down. Sure Jeremy was down on Atlas OnePoint. But he’s been just as negative about:

Seriously, he flamed database abstraction layers? Jeremy is clearly an angry, angry man. πŸ™‚ Hmm. You know what, maybe folks should vote for Jeremy. I think I’m more likely to flame a spammer, but that Jeremy guy gets really grumpy sometimes. Maybe an SEO award would cheer him up?

(By the way, funny, creative awards attract link love. Loren, lots of SEO blogs will link to you as a result of your blog awards. Smart, very smart.)

19 Responses to He broke my hort! (Leave a comment)

  1. first post? πŸ˜‰

    just like to say that is hilarious. Great spam art

  2. Hi Matt

    “Let’s see why you might vote for me”

    No way. A vote for a backlink or a blinking neon. Do we have a deal πŸ™‚

    Have just voted “5” for Danny, Nick and you. I like the informal style and rich info exchange.

    Now, where is my blinking neon πŸ™‚

  3. I got my tireflies for 7-8 bucks; you can afford it, Harith. πŸ™‚

  4. That spam heart cracks me up! Awesome!

  5. Sorry, Matt, I have to abstain–I saw the cheesy hand-pointing icons sending me toward the ads on SEJ, and immediately hit the back button… πŸ™‚

  6. Hey, in the Matt vs Jeremy contest, I just noticed that Matt has a PR of 7 now and Jeremy has a PR of 8.

    Zero to PR7 in six months? πŸ™‚

  7. Give thanks to Jeremy. His link here got me reading what you write. πŸ™‚

    Why? I’m one of the wikipedia techs and we’re a target, so clues about what to watch for are welcome.

  8. 0 to 7 in 6 months? Of course: Do a Link:www.mattcutts.com/blog

    It shows almost 1000 sites. (and google doesn’t show all)

    Do it on MSN and it shows almost 40,000

    That’s a hell of alot of links… pr7 justified.

  9. Yup, I did it the old-fashioned way, Byron. Original posts and a dash of spammer flaming.

  10. Now we’re talking! πŸ™‚

  11. Is there a recipe book for flamed spam?

  12. The “spam” folder (well, fold is the wrong word) in GMail offers up spam recipies all the time. πŸ™‚

  13. As a matter of fact, here’s the Spam Hashbrown Bake courtesy of Google via the GMail spam folder link ad:

    MMMMM—– Recipe via Meal-Master ™ v8.05

    Title: SPAM HASHBROWN BAKE
    Categories: Main dish
    Yield: 8 Servings

    1.00 pk Frozen hashbrown potatoes,
    -thawed slightly (32 oz)
    0.50 c Butter or margarine, melted
    1.00 t Salt
    1.00 t Pepper
    0.50 t Garlic powder
    2.00 c Shredded Cheddar cheese
    1.00 cn SPAM Luncheon Meat, cubed
    -(12 oz)
    1.00 cn Cream of chicken soup
    -(10 3/4 oz)
    1.50 c Sour cream
    0.50 c Milk
    0.50 c Chopped onion
    0.25 c CHI-CHI’s Diced Green
    -Chilies, drained
    2.00 c Crushed potato chips

    Heat oven to 350’F. In large bowl, combine potatoes, melted butter,
    salt, pepper, and garlic powder. In another bowl, combine cheese,
    SPAM, soup, sour cream, milk, onion, and green chilies. Add SPAM
    mixture to potato mixture; mix well. Pour into 2-quart baking dish.
    Sprinkle with potato chips. Bake 45-60 minutes or until thoroughly
    heated.

    MMMMM

  14. re: spam recipes folder

    ROFLMAO!

  15. nice broken heart spam graphic… that’s really superb. your work?

    yo matt: tell the masters of the universe over there they need to hire a few more funny, smart-ass evangelists like yourself. if there were more of you guys around, then i wouldn’t have to flame you guys so much:
    http://500hats.typepad.com/500blogs/2005/12/googlevangelism.html

    meantime, keep spreading the love. and the spam.

    – dave mcclure
    http://www.SimplyHired.com

  16. Isn’t all your linking to Jeremy just putting you in closer proximity to porn sites? (as you’ve stated that Jeremy is now linking 2 steps from porn?)

  17. David McClure, that url looked 404, but I agree that we need more people doing this. Google is chock full of funny, smart people who could do what I do. We just need to pull a few away from their current projects. BTW, the heart spam graphic came from Flickr; I considered it ironic to use Yahoo’s own (excellent) image product to poke some goodhearted fun at Jeremy.

    jim, I did remove JZ from my blogroll thingie, but more as the mock post against him. We’ll see what he does at the end of his one month experiment.

  18. My vote goes to Matt. He flamed Jeremy for crying out loud! Of course by linking to Jeremy, Matt is only 3 clicks away from porn πŸ™‚

    Jeremy is more likely to cuss, rant and rave and eventually rank for your name. Remeind me to never send Jeremy an unsolicited email.

    http://www.google.com/search?&q=atlas+onepoint
    http://search.yahoo.com/search?p=atlas+onepoint

  19. dammit. looks like the TypePad downtime killed that post. ask Patrick Chanezon for the details… he offered to buy me off with a beer next week πŸ˜‰

    (for the conspiracy-minded: one of you Googlers had Shellen & his boys pull the plug on Six Apart’s colo just to get rid of my post, right? i knew it.)

    seriously tho — i think you do a great job as an [individual] evangelist. still, it would be great to see Google offer a more comprehensive program for working with the developer community.

    i agree, i thought the HomePage API launch was hugely under-reported; except for Gary Price and a few others seemed like it was barely noticed. contrast that with all the noise Yahoo made about Konfabulator widgets, and what Microsoft did with Start.com / Live.com.

    not to say any one of them is better than the other, but i think you guys do yourselves a disservice by not making those kind of moves more visible. your brand is great & the products are cool, but it still takes a little pro-active effort to make people aware of the opportunity.

    my .02,

    – dave mcclure
    http://www.SimplyHired.com
    http://500hats.typepad.com (if TypePad is working)

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