Funny spam email

I first got to know Gary Stock because of his Googlewhack site (a “googlewhack” is a pair of words which, when typed into Google, return exactly one web page). As co-founder of Nexcerpt, he’s a good guy to know in general. Recently Gary got a spam email with my name in the subject field. It looked like this (reproduced with permission):

Subject: Google’s Matt Cutts talks about buying links.
Date: Thu, 7 Dec 2006 21:39:24 -0500
From: “Johns D. Gideon” <xxx @xxxxxxxxxx.xx.xx>
To: <xxxxxxxxx @xxxxxxxx.xxx>

Here’s a funny Google song.
AskJeeves has crawled thousands of pages, while indexing none of them.
Among the top five search engines, Microsoft Corp. Among the top five
search engines, Microsoft Corp.
The webmaster should add text links for the site navigation or he should
change the whole navigation from image links to text links. Getting
listed on Google is possible. The more clearly you structure your text,
the easier it is for search engines to process it.
He also said that the links to your web site should look natural.
There are dozens of web page factors that can influence your search
engine rankings. If you want to have rankings, your web site must have
both.
Back to table of contents – Visit Axandra. in claims to be the world’s
widest Web search. Google finds only one backlink to the web site.
Yahoo’s global usage share remains stable. What are paid links?
You then just have to wait until it comes out of the sandbox.
Google seeks to stop Microsoft from suing new hire. Whether you Googled
for Paris Hilton, a stock tip or a gift for Mom, you’v
Getting listed on Google is possible. What does this mean to your Google
rankings? They usually won’t bring you visitors that are interested in
what you have to offer.
Google to open research and development center in China. This
distribution partnership is probably only the start.
Has your web site been dropped from Google and you don’t know why? That
will help search engines to classify the page.
The whole web site doesn’t contain links to related web sites.
This week, we’re taking another look at keywords and search engine optimization.
You cannot see it at all in the picture above. Otherwise, they wouldn’t
be listed on the first result page.
Google doesn’t expect that new web sites have a large number of links.
But most of all, it wants to be successful.

You know you’re doing something right when you get included as gibberish in spam emails. 🙂

47 Responses to Funny spam email (Leave a comment)

  1. You still gonna say that when you’re unofficially endorsing “V|agr.a, C|a.li5, and Phen.term.|ne”? 😉

  2. Good morning Matt

    “ou know you’re doing something right when you get included as gibberish in spam emails”

    In fact “Matt Cutts” is no more a name, but a “term” related to SEO, the white and black ones…. and more. For example:

    Register Your Domains With Google’s Matt CUtts!

    Matt Cutts barters Back Links with Happy Meals!

    Does Google Feed Too Many Babies to Matt Cutts, Thus Treating Him Like a Baby? 🙂

    etc…

  3. Yes, it is a form of compliment, but not one I seek. A similar thing happens with the text of my other site where they took my domain name and got a “.us” then put up a site that is horrendously cookie cutter – they have the same exact web pages at several different domains (most of them exact trademarked names or plays on trademarked names of the leading people in my sector.

    While my relatively new (under a year old) website got a compliment of sorts by being included in this mess with the big boys of my sector. I would rather not have been affected.

    Google was very good at identifying those websites as pretty valueless and they are hardly ever seen in Google results. Yahoo still shows them on the front page when you search for my trade mark, or other trademarks in the industry.

    Google is doing very good with spam detection in my sector, the results that shouldn’t really be there aren’t and the ones that are there make sense to be there. Oddly, although it is pretty spam free it is very outdated. I remember making a bet with someone about how long it would take a certain to drop in the rankings (the place closed) we made this bet four years ago. I lost, I thought it would drop pretty quick. For four years, one of the top ten results is no longer is business for a specific query. It still there.
    I am tired and beginning to sound like a gibberish email.

    Congratulations on being deemed good enough for gibberish : )

  4. Is your mother proud of you?

    Seriously though, it’s kinda funny 🙂

  5. Any chance of recording it with a bit of music behind it and putting it up on Myspace?

  6. hehe… Congrats, Matt. NOW you are a very important person 😀

  7. http://google.blognewschannel.com/archives/2006/12/20/google-holds-first-pajama-day-in-beta/

    Speaking of Spam, how was the Google pajama office party?
    Any pics to share…..huh 😀

  8. was the spam email selling anything?

  9. Maybe we have spamie awards, for the best spam of the year.
    This would get my vote.

    What is this about a Google pajama office party???

  10. but what is the “song” sung to?

  11. Ok, while we’re on this topic of spam gibberish, what the heck is that all about? The gibberish spam variant has now become my #1 nemesis. Is it simply a matter avoiding spam filtering software? Because the few times my email client misses it, I delete it without clicking on links, so it doesn’t seem like a good marketing tact. Is it just some sort of virus that takes over the zombie computer and sends the gibberish to annoy both the person sending and receiving? This sort of spam annoys me the most because 1) its gibberish culled from collections of webpages (???), 2) it doesn’t seem to serve any real purpose … unless the purpose is to just see if it could be done. Bah.

  12. Finally Ahead Dave

    At least it’s not a deal offered for medicine for cows in Angola, or a Nigerian money scam.

    Happy Holidays Matt!

  13. Let’s be fair – the intend is to get the recipients interest and tempting them to open the mail. Many of us internet geeks would have a quick peek at an e-mail if the subject carries your name as you tend to have something worthwhile to share.

    Quite clever, albeit extremely annoying. Even though it is, in a way, a compliment and telling you that you are fairly well known (which you should be able to tell by the many comments on each blog post 😉 ) it would not be something I would be happy with. Think about it, they are using your name to spam now and you don’t really want the phrase Matt Cutts to be associated with spam, since there are still plenty of people who don’t know who you are.

    Just my 2cts though 🙂 (There’s not really anything you can do about people using your name to spam anyway unfortunately.)

  14. hehe cool my link bleeds out of your comment area

  15. Hey Matt,

    Nice email.. gotta lay off the spiked eggnog when you’re doing the correspondence buddy :p

    Maybe you might want to submit that headline over at http://www.spamusement.com/ ?

  16. S.E.W., I didn’t participate, but my favorite was that there was a little-known contingent that rebelled and dressed way up for Pajama day.

  17. It might be said that you’re becoming a brand in your own right–sort of a spin-off of the Google brand.

    With the chatter going on out there about “brandverbing”, I see a new world of ways to discus SEO-type stuff:

    “Look at all the spam on that site. That thing needs to be mattcutted into oblivion.”
    “I got my site mattcutt on yahoo but it still ranks well over on MSN.”
    “Google cutts well known manufacturer site from the search results due to spam”
    “The 10,000 back links I bought are so far under the radar there’s no way my site’s going to get mattcutted.”
    “The new algorithm completely automates mattcutting so we’ll be retasking a number of people within the organization.”

    The uses seem endless.

  18. Let’s see…

    “Matt Cutts” – 1.1 million results
    “Paris Hilton” – 30.5 million results

    Does that mean Paris has a larger impact on the WWW than Matt?

    Maybe…

    She even beats out “Bill Gates” – 29.9 million results 🙁

  19. I wish we could edit our comments, because I just remembered…

    Matt – What’s up with reinclusion requests? I did one recently based on your recommendation. I did it though Google’s Webmaster Tools. I submitted two request and never heard back – not even a “canned” response.

    What’s up with that?

  20. I wonder if you would be as impressed when your name is used in spam emails and websites that were associated with gay porn? I know that mine is and I don’t like it when I see my name comes up in the Google results for these spammy sites. Funny thing here is I don’t ever see them come up in any other search engine, just Google.

  21. I ask the same question as morefiles? What’s the tune or melody? I think it should sung to the melody of iron Butterfly’s Ina Gadda Da Vida…LOL

  22. BillyS

    Reinclusion requests if done right, they are powerful indeed. Maybe you hadn’t included the following sentence:

    I have cleaned my site (s) of everything which wasn’t in accordance with Google Webmaster Guidelines. And I promiss that I will follow those Guidelines for the rest of my physical life. Amen!

    Just give it a try, BillyS 🙂

  23. I received this email as well – it made it right through the Gmail spam filter. Perhaps the result of a little name dropping? 🙂

  24. >> Google doesn’t expect that new web sites have a large number of links.
    Is it true ?

  25. RE: “Here’s a funny Google song..”
    =========================================

    To what tune is it sung?

  26. RE: “>> Google doesn’t expect that new web sites have a large number of links.
    Is it true ? ”
    =========================================

    Common sense IMO.

  27. RE: “Matt – What’s up with reinclusion requests? I did one recently based on your recommendation. I did it though Google’s Webmaster Tools. I submitted two request and never heard back – not even a “canned” response.”
    ==========================================

    You have to actually *clean up*, not just send a reinclusion request.

  28. Hy Matt,

    what about this

    http://groups-beta.google.com/group/ugg-boots/web/cowboy+boots.html

    redirect? on google groups? How could that be?

    greets Martin

  29. Wow. Worst. Song. EVER! 🙂

  30. Seems you have been tagged Matty boy! Whoop!

    http://www.unpluggedmarketing.com/12/5-things-you-dont-know-about-me/

  31. Very interesting – js redirect inserted just between HEAD and BODY:
    eval(unescape("var1%3D767%3B%0D%0Avar2%3Dvar1%3B%0D%0Aif%28var1%3D%3Dvar2%29%20document%2Elocation%3D%22%68%74%74%70%3A%2F%2F%74%6F%70%2D%72%65%73%75%6C%74%2E%6E%65%74%2F%73%65%61%72%63%68%2E%70%68%70%3F%71%3D%63%6F%77%62%6F%79%2B%62%6F%6F%74%73%22%3B%0D%0A"))

  32. Hey Matt

    Are you having a data push and updating backlinks today while you have The Cutts on a visit. How come? 🙂

  33. It isn’t as funny as the wave of spam I was having a month or so back..

    It was along the lines of

    “Your website Gmail.com doesn’t appear in Google”

    and

    “Get top rankings for your domain Gmail.com in Google”

    There has also been a lot of blog spam recently that only had a link to Google.com that didn’t make sense.

  34. >>You have to actually *clean up*, not just send a reinclusion request.

    ——————————–

    Thanks for the tip… 😉

    I provided the detail on why I thought a penalty might exist. I’m also not sure why anyone would point this out (like I did) and not have already cleaned it up too.

  35. [quote]a bit of music behind it [/quote]

    “Run Away!” from Spamalot, natch. 😉

  36. A million years from now all that will be left is SPAM. Imagine the future people trying to figure out civilization out using only SPAM.

  37. Scott

    “A million years from now all that will be left is SPAM”

    And hidden text… just like that at the bottom of this site. Hit Ctrl+A and enjoy some delicious 2006 spam.

    Something to keep Adam Lasnik busy, may be 🙂

  38. Nice one Harith, they’ve got everything but a hit counter and it would be 1994 all over again. Nice use of the meta description there, tells you just what you need to know about that page.

  39. I’m also not sure why anyone would point this out (like I did) and not have already cleaned it up too.

    Never underestimate the power of human stupidity, BillyS.

    Someone might point it out, and claim it’s useful to the customer because of XXX, or they may point it out and say Site Y is doing it, or…well, that’s enough.

  40. Google doesn’t expect that new web sites have a large number of links.
    But most of all, it wants to be successful.

    I think google should give high ranks for new sites. at least give them chance for a week. after all, it costs money to register them

  41. >> Google doesn’t expect that new web sites have a large number of links.
    Is it true ?

    I hate spammers.

  42. So do I. I hate spammer too. But sometimes, they are kinda funny. really liked the song 😛

  43. There’s no funnier spammers than the Penis Enlarge Patch spammers

    God Bless the Makers of the Penis Enlarge Patch

    Over 300 different hilarious P.E.P. spams and counting …

  44. This is what landed in my Gmail mailbox. These Kings of spammers combine bad SEO with e-mail spam. That is something different.
    ———————————————
    Greeting,

    Comapny looks to move from Pinksheets

    to NASDBB

    the company hire an auditor firm to become current

    with the SEC

    This should add up-side to the stock

    and this company has revenue

    V IDE0 search YAH00 & G00GLE for full story use these keyworks: oil and ga=
    s exploration and production

    Stocks climbed early Thursday, buoyed by solid earnings results from Oracl=
    e and Nike. Markets were higher in Europe and mixed in Asia. 9:49 a.m.

  45. Google doesn’t expect that new web sites have a large number of links.
    But most of all, it wants to be successful.

    I think google should give high ranks for new sites. at least give them chance for a week. after all, it costs money to register them

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