Dude, you’re getting a Mini!

First it was acetaminophen.
Then it was a goodie bag.
Now Seth Godin convinced Google to give Joel a mini.

Stop the madness, people! We need to reset expectations. The next person who complains? I’ve got some dusty old hockey gear, or some ancient ethernet cables–they only carry bits in one direction. Maybe in a while we can work up to Google Gum.

P.S. As Joel finds out, the Google Search Appliance (GSA) is self-contained; it doesn’t need a connection to the internet to work. Unlike Google’s web search, GSA owners can select phrases and hard-wire what to return. So Joel picked a phrase he wanted to hard-wire and he was off to the races. A more traditional use of that feature would be to make sure that your company’s HR department’s page was returned for a query like [hr], although the Mini is usually smart enough to get queries like this right without any help.

42 Responses to Dude, you’re getting a Mini! (Leave a comment)

  1. Harith

    Hi Matt,

    “Maybe in a while we can work up to Google Gum.”

    Not that good. How about that nice T-Shirt “IT’S ON NOW” :)

  2. But anyone can get that T-shirt, Harith:
    http://topatoco.com/itson.htm
    The deep navy from Hanes is really nice.

  3. Matt, you’re making a great case for Google, Yahoo!, Ask, and MSN collaborating on an SEO institute. You could each give away one free week of SEO classes per quarter. People would flock to your registration pages just for a chance of getting a free week’s worth of classes (airfare and hotel accomodations not included).

  4. Man,

    I think that’s pretty cool of Google to give something away to keep a customer happy. That’s really cool! Seems like Google actually cares about people (customers/employees) and aren’t ONLY concerned with the bottom line.

  5. When I saw the title of this post I thought it was going to be a mini cooper all decked out with the Google logo.

  6. Hey Matt, FYI, the google gum I ordered last month was really stale. The lava lamp I order is still foggy after a month as well…wish the google store products were of better quality…. For a “job well done” reward recently I’ve been giving out stale Google gum and foggy google lava lamps….maybe Google needs better suppliers of google products.

  7. Dibs on the hockey gear…

  8. > When I saw the title of this post I thought it was going to be a mini cooper all
    > decked out with the Google logo.

    Chris, I thought the same thing! And hmm… actually, that would be a cool thing for the Google Store to carry, but I’m guessing the shipping charges might be a bit high.

    And speaking of the Google Store… regarding your comments, Jim, I’m really sorry to hear that! I’ve had generally good luck with the Google Store (yes, even we employees order from them on occasion :P), but the couple of times I’ve had issues with their service or the product they shipped me, I got a very satisfactory resolution.

    If you have a minute, I definitely recommend you dropping them an e-mail or giving them a call (contact info is on their site) and letting them know your concerns. I’m confident they’ll help you out, but — more importantly — if there’s a quality control issue, they need to know about this. We (as Googlers) definitely only want quality gear with our logo on it! :-)

  9. Travis

    Very clever PR but this sounds like it’s setting an unwanted precedent. I still want a PC case that looks like the Google Search Appliance, that design is just awesome. Who do I have to bug to get a tower designed like that :-D?

  10. Danny

    Doesn’t look like Joel’s [mindless complexity] search is working like he wants. A search for [.NET] turns up very different results.

  11. I saw the title of this post and thought you were getting a new car!

  12. CJ

    First soda and now t-shirts ? lol Is this the start of a new endorsement trend Matt? *jk*

  13. Ralf

    Jim Boykin you are not alone
    Adam Lasnik they do not answer their mail
    so I drop my complaint about delivery time right here

    we received this mail on February 15 2006

    GoogleStore International
    ——————————————————
    Order Number: 7747
    Date Ordered: Wednesday 21 December, 2005
    Your order has been updated to the following status.
    New status: Despatched

  14. Travis, I think the mini is a standard rackmount server now. Don’t know if it’s 1U, 2U, or 3U though.

  15. Al

    Its 1U, half depth and is only held in by little ears (I feel the need to get that in, ‘cos I don’t like them ;)). They are quite sweet, the make silly chirping noises when they are booted… if you need one though, you know all this.

  16. Matt –

    How about those hard disks you wrote about a while back? No, don’t wipe them first! Now that would be some pretty cool schwag.

    Tom

  17. What’s next? Google giving me a corvette for being a loyal member?! ;)

  18. I’ve got a better idea for a giveaway.

    Any of you guys remember the old portable PCs? The 45-50 pound jobs with the big metal bar handles because plastic handles wouldn’t support the weight? They kind of looked like those weights Wile E. Coyote used to try and drop on the Roadrunner.

    Start giving those away. Better yet, claim they’re retired Google DC servers and they’re collectables. You could probably make 5-6 digits off of one easy doing that.

  19. Where do you go to pre order the gum?

  20. So I have to complain before I get presents..? :)
    Google does a good job with this. If the presents are not that well.. doesn’t matter.. I agree with Aaron. Good PR.. this can give persons a good feeling.

    Thnx for all the videos.. questions are answered because you bring it good so that every person can understand it. This is a good quality to have as person. Hopefully some more oscar videos..

  21. robert

    I can recommend the MINI Cooper – I live 20 mile from the factory in Oxford, England. 35MPG AND coool.
    Wake up America – buy your friends’ cars – not your enemies oil.

  22. Matt – I will be traveling (on my own dime) to San Jose for SES from Chicago – I would like meet you. Shoot me an e-mail with some places you’ll be please!

    All I want is a respectful and serious consideration of my desire to interview at and work for Google in a Marketing, Advertising Sales, Partner Solutions or Search Syndication Services in a post-MBA level role – ideally serving dMarc, local or mobile. The only thing I want in the mail is an offer letter. Though I love natural search of course. :)

    david
    dot
    dalka
    at
    gmail

  23. i have to receive my first gift from google

  24. I have had companies offering me free stuff recently after seeing that I review products on a few of my blogs, you have to be careful about taking free stuff, it can corrupt.

    I think high quality Google coffee mugs like the ones you get at Disney (with Mickey on them) would be really cool. Mugs that pass the chip and age test, ones that will be on our desks for years passing the brand from person to person “Hey cool Google mug, where do I get one”???

    Google is a quality company right? That lava lamp thing Jim speaks of is a really bad move, a long lasting item with logo like a (white) coffee mug can go an extremely long way in a business environment. A lame cheap cloudy lava lamp passes negative low quality feelings.

    I will take a white coffee mug please, it directly relates to good feelings of morning. You know Dunkin Donuts?

    Get
    with
    the
    program
    Google!

  25. Rex in TX

    It is amazing that mickey didn’t get upset over google giving mini away after that incident with goofy over pluto…

    too many toons at an early age corrupted the mind…

  26. german

    I want a goodie bag tooo!!!!

    Where should I complain?

    Don’t worry about post -send it to your Google office in Vienna and I will pick it myself!

  27. Donald Thump

    I complained to google once… Next morning two code enforces showed up…you know Gates and Turner…with stun guns…
    Man did that mess up my toupee…anyhow as I laid there quite shocked I heard them say as they exited…”you’re fired”…
    the rest is tv history…

  28. So complaining about features means that you get free stuff?

    Cool. I want free stuff and I have a legitimate issue.

    My Google toolbar recently upgraded to v. 4 and reset my button settings. I had to put back the PageRank button, the Voting buttons (which I doubt do much but I use them anyway), and get rid of about half a dozen that I didn’t want (AutoFill, Bookmarks, etc.)

    I don’t mind if there are new buttons and you use the toolbar to tell me about them, but don’t install them by default and take away the existing ones first. Dat’s not cool, mang.

  29. One thing I forgot…I didn’t upgrade the toolbar myself. It was automatically upgraded.

  30. I think what Google really needs is a cuddly toy mascot like Netscape had back in the day.

    A green cuddly dinosaur thingy – for those of you not olde enough to remember

  31. “some ancient ethernet cables–they only carry bits in one direction.”

    While my guess is you were being funny with this comment Matt, there actually are some real-world valid applications (mostly security related) where you physically cut wires in the Ethernet cable so communication can really, really only be one way. Connection-less protocols (UDP) can be used – needless to say, TCP doesn’t work too well as it is difficult to hand-shake if you can’t do a SYN-ACK! ;-)

  32. Damn, if only someone would send me cool gear. :P I’d review it and take pictures of me using/wearing it and slap it up on my site. lol. (as long as it is appropriate! don’t get any pervy thoughts now) Hey, its free advertising for the sender….. I’m going to start doing videos of new gadgets and stuff, should be fun and interesting.

    Regarding the Google store..I got a couple things once, and they arrived quickly, and were pretty good quality products. Its fast and easy, which is what I liked best.

    Oh, Matt…I was wondering….. how would someone like me be able to get an interview with someone like you? :)

  33. Aaron Pratt

    alek – yeah, ethernet cables do not leak data like wireless, I will keep my corded phone, cabled network and tin foil hat. ;)

    white coffee cups please with choices of our favorite google logos, thank you.

  34. Harith

    Good morning Matt

    Gadgets time :)

    I guess after all those great Videos and heavy SEO stuff that you have graciously given us, its time to relax with some of your inspiring Gadgets posts.

    Have a great day and a successful week.

  35. Guys, this is a Google mania. I am waiting to Google condom :-D

  36. Ralf,

    Here’s the number (listed on their site) to call the Google Store. I’ve not had problems getting replies by e-mail from them, and I’ve definitely always gotten through to someone by phone with less than 30 second hold times:

    1-866-746-6453

    Good luck, and sorry for the troubles you’ve had!

  37. If anyone is desperate for some Google schwag I have one of those clock radio ambient light thingys Google sent out for Christmas still in the box. It’s not for resell so I’ll happily post it for free to the first person to enquire through our site with the words ‘clock radio’ in the comments.

    Matt, does the store really sell many of those Google Bib Bike Shorts?
    http://www.google-store.com/product_info.php?products_id=203

  38. Damn…i havent been completely happy with google in years….I want a goody bag!! :D Someone i work with has that case with the google mouse and USB light etc etc….im so jealous but dont have the money to actually buy this stuff.

    Im really enjoying your site Matt, you just need a little more Emmy. :D

    Auliya

  39. wow! the google store is even better than i thought! Damn those lights would be nice…so much cool stuff….sigh…

  40. I hope they sell the Google Checkout promotional t-shirts on the Google Store. I missed out on them.

  41. I just want a shirt that says “I sell shit with AdWords”. Because I really do!!

  42. I think GSA will be more useful to the CRM, Business intelligence professionals and especially a large organization, the features to access information on realtime through its knowledge base system would be really useful, I hope it would be secured as well.

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